How to Talk to Your Kids About COVID-19
Edited by: Stephen Braren & Rose Perry, Ph.D.
How to Talk to Your Kids About COVID-19 | By now, your child has likely heard about COVID-19, whether from friends, on the internet, or on television. They have also likely heard some misinformation. As things develop in real time, it can be difficult to separate truth from falsehoods. That is why it is important your child knows they can come to you with questions they have about the virus and our new reality.
Discussing COVID-19 with your child can certainly be a challenge and may even feel overwhelming or daunting. What should I tell them? What should I not tell them? What if I don’t know the answer to their questions? Continue reading for some guidance on how to best approach these kinds of conversations and reassure your child that you are both in this together.
Take care of yourself first
Check in with yourself. How are you feeling? You are a role model for your kids and they will pick up on your reactions, no matter their age. If you are feeling anxious or worried about the virus and its implications, it is probably not the best time to talk to them. Check out our previous post for some stress management tips, and find a time to sit down with them when you are feeling more at ease. They will pick up on your cues and be comforted by your calm presence.
Listen and observe
Ask your child what they know about the virus, and encourage them to ask questions. Let them lead the conversation, and make sure you give them a safe space for sharing. They may not have a lot of questions, which is okay, but make sure they know you are always available when they do.
Validate their feelings
Do not diminish your child’s fears or anxieties, but rather show empathy. They may feel confused, scared, or lonely since they cannot see their friends and may not fully understand why. They may be upset they are missing out on important life events, like school dances, a friend’s birthday party, graduation, or sporting events. Those feelings are legitimate, and your child may feel better knowing they are not alone in feeling that way. If they are worried about getting sick, empower them to take care of their health. Explain to them that while kids have a lower risk of contracting the virus, they can prevent getting sick by:
Washing their hands for 20-30 seconds
Coughing/sneezing into their elbow
Practicing social distancing (avoid groups and stay at least six feet apart from others)
Staying inside as much as possible
Be honest but sensitive
Give your child clear age-appropriate information. Answer their questions honestly, but do not share more than what is necessary. For example, sharing the death toll would probably be more upsetting than helpful. If you don’t know the answer to a question, this is a good opportunity to learn something new together. There are many trustworthy sources you can turn to for current information on COVID-19 like the World Health Organization, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, and Coronavirus.gov.
Be media smart
Just as there are many reliable sources offering information about COVID-19, there is also a great deal of misinformation out there. It is important to distinguish fact from fiction, especially when it comes to our health. This may be particularly salient if your kids are older and spend time on the internet and social media, where little is fact-checked. Here are some questions you and your child can ask yourselves when you read a news story:
What is the source of this story? Does it seem credible?
Who pays for the media outlet? Who gets paid when this story is read or shared? News agencies are typically for-profit businesses – at the end of the day, they are trying to make money, which can influence both what they do and do not report.
Who is the author of the story? What is their background, and how could this impact their perspective on this topic?
Does the headline accurately describe the story? Headlines are used to capture an audience. They can be misleading, so it is important to read on.
Are other outlets reporting a similar story? Is the information corroborated by other sources?
Use this as a teaching moment
Throughout these conversations, emphasize that this virus is no one’s fault – anyone can get it no matter what they look like, where they are from, what language they speak, or which religion they practice. This is a good opportunity to talk about how the outbreak is affecting different people disproportionately and to remind your children to practice compassion toward others.
This is a hard time for parents who may be juggling work, homeschooling, and childcare on top of routine responsibilities. For many of us, this is a particularly stressful time and you may be facing unexpected hardships. Be kind to yourself. What is most important right now is that your child feels secure in their relationship with you and knows they can come to you with difficult questions anytime. Keep the social connections alive and strong within your home by checking in with your kids regularly and having continued conversations about this unprecedented time.
For more COVID-19-related resources for parents and kids of all ages, check out the links below: